This isn’t the time to implement your dream of recreating Little House on the Prairie, unless that comes easily to you and helps all of you feel better. Reassess frequently, and if what you’re doing is creating more power struggles, don’t be afraid to toss it and start over.
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Without connection, it’s easy for our fear to grow as exponentially as the Covid-19 infection rates.
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A Growth Fostering Relationship is marked by the Five Good Things. Coined by Jean Baker Miller in her transformational book, Toward a New Psychology of Women. These are the qualities of a relationship that creates fulfillment and counters inauthenticity and inequity. They include:
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No matter how much confidence she exhibited while offering home remedies for infant constipation and baby food recipes, she struggled with uncertainty. The matriarchal totem is full of mamas making mistakes while making meaning. I’m grateful for their wisdom.
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What skills will we take into this unknown? If our kids will be growing up in a revolution, what do we need to teach them?
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It’s a paradox. Our connection will help soothe our anxious brains, but it can’t work if it can’t first see what is there. The first work of that connection is seeing the anxiety/rage/discomfort/whatever and letting it be there. It can’t be trying to suppress, fix, or avoid it. But once we have that acceptance of what is, that authentic connection in the midst of struggle, there’s enough solid ground for calm to take root. We have to risk the fast shallow breaths to get to the good deep ones.
Read moreBloomington Community Invited to Break Down Barriers with Dr. Maureen Walker and Daryl Davis Bloomington Center for Connection (BCC) is delighted to announce its first community events: Power Redefined: Disruptive Empathy as a Tool for Liberation Friday, August 10 7-9 p.m. and Conversations Reimagined: Relational Cultural Theory in Action Saturday, August 11, 9 a.m. – 5 p.m. Sponsored by Griffin Realty, both events are free and open to the public and take place the Monroe […]
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Relational-Cultural Theory (RCT) has been presented as an antidote to the divisiveness we face on a daily basis. Whether the dissonance is of polar opposite political views, or a struggle over the best route to a common goal, RCT can help create and nurture the relationships necessary to move forward. This post is part one in a series. Because RCT pushes against a model of competition and independence, it can be misunderstood as “just being […]
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