Connection is the way of the Universe

Recent science reporting confirms: the sugar found in raspberries has also been found in interstellar space. What does it mean, finding sugar in the milky way (other than someone needs to create some sort of raspberry milky-way shake asap).

The discovery does not suggest that the galaxy revolves around a distant civilisation of pale, safety-conscious frugivores, but shows that compounds important for life can form in the frigid expanse between the stars. -- The Guardian

I've repeated that last bit in my mind like a mantra: ingredients for life can form in the frigid expanse between the stars.

Before there were cities, before there were humans, or fish, or organisms, there were molecules bumping into each other, connecting, creating, becoming. There were stars making elements, matter gathering into planets. The ingredients of life were becoming, and finding each other.

Life didn't begin out of nowhere and nothing; causes and conditions came together, creating new ingredients, making new connections.

Many traditional ideas about human development paint a line of progress from dependency as an infant to triumphant independence as an adult. We are inundated with phrases like:

• Chart your own path.
• Stand on your own two feet
• You have to decide for you. (Meaning, ignore the impact of decisions on relationships)
• The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your arm.
• We are born alone, and we die alone. (um what?)
• Freedom comes from self-reliance

Relational-Cultural Theory (RCT) challenges hyperindividualism as a desriable outcome. RCT posits that we grow through and toward relationships, for better or for worse. We become who we are because of the connections in our lives. Humans aren't designed to live without each other. Even those on solitary journeys rely on others who have taught them, helped them prepare, and maybe sometimes bring them snacks. Isolation (not solitude) causes great suffering.

Being a part of something larger doesn't diminish our individual experience. Rather, it can expand our sense of belonging, of mattering. This happens when we feel the support of a network of friends, join a celebration or a protest, or connect with our family. 

As our sense of human relationships expands, we can also appreciate the vastness of all that is connected. Our sense of belonging can continue to expand. The tree, raspberry bush, microbes in the soil, people tending a garden—and apparently molecules drifting around in space—are part of a much larger story of interdependence. Our relationship with that world can offer zest, clarity, a sense of worth, movement, and a desire for more connection.

Ecological mutuality is understanding that we are impacted by, and impact, the ecosystem that surrounds us. When we shift from dominance to interdependent care, connection deepens and sustainability becomes possible.

Mutuality is the ingredient in a relationship that allows all parties to be impacted by what happens. It is a sense of being truly, in it together. If we imagine the world as something separate from us, existing primarily for our use, exploitation becomes easier. If we experience ourselves as participants in an interdependent web, care becomes relational. What happens to this place matters to me because I am a part of it. I belong here. 

It is easy to become overwhelmed by the news on any given day. Climate change, genocide, war, attacks on marginalized people, polarization, all of these increase our experience of fear and uncertainty. Learning about sugar in space will not help us find certainty. There's so much we don't know.

So maybe finding the chemistry of raspberries among the stars doesn't prove that we all belong to one another. But I love that it reminds us of how old, and how universal, the ingredients of belonging might be.